


I Saw The Sign

by danhowellsjeans



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: ASL use, Gender Dysphoria, M/M, Nonverbal Communication, Panic Attacks, Trans Evan, god bless the discord, mentioned transphobic actions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-08-16
Packaged: 2018-12-15 22:52:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11815845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danhowellsjeans/pseuds/danhowellsjeans
Summary: Evan goes nonverbal after a panic attack.Jared's always there for him.





	I Saw The Sign

**Author's Note:**

  * For [smashleyed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/smashleyed/gifts).



> hey go check out my beta writer and the most amazing mom ever: smashleyed

Jared was very accustomed to Evan's panic attacks and how to help him. He'd spent the majority of his life by Evan's side, of course, so he'd picked up a few things here and there.

At around age 12, Evan's anxiety had started to increase severely. He'd always had it, but until that point it'd never quite been debilitating in any way. A simple touch to reassure him was all he needed.

Then, it changed. He'd have worse panic attacks, curling in on himself and not moving for ages. He'd shake, and his breathing would be so forced that it concerned everyone around him. Sometimes, if it was very, very bad, after he'd calmed down, he wouldn't be able to speak.

Jared immediately took it upon himself to learn the best ways of communication for when this happened. Within a year, he'd fluently learned sign language alongside Evan.

The two boys made it through high school with minor scars. They mutually agreed it'd be best for them to go to the same college, as well as being roommates. Jared could have the peace of mind that came with being able to help Evan, and Evan would have someone to lean on nearby. It worked for the both of them.

* * *

  
Currently, Jared was alone in his dorm room. Evan had gone out for the night, heading to some kind of meeting for one of his weird plant clubs. He wasn't supposed to be back until late.

At least, that's what Jared thought, until the door burst open. "Evan! You're back early...is everything alright?" Evan didn't speak, only stumbling into the room and falling onto the bed. He was slightly shaking, and Jared knew instantly what was wrong. He moved to Evan's side. "Can I touch you?" He asked softly, and Evan nodded. Jared wrapped his arms gently around his friend's waist, holding him close. He whispered softly, counting Evan's breaths with him as he rocked him back and forth.

Soon, the tension in Evan's shoulder's began to fall away. His breathing steadied, his eyes opened. Jared sighed in relief, glad that Evan was able to breathe easy again. "You alright, buddy?" Evan opened his mouth to respond, but grimaced and instead raised his hands up to start signing. [I'm alright. Thank you, Jared.]

[Would you like something to drink?] There was no real need for Jared to be signing, Evan could hear him just fine, but the two of them had discussed before that sometimes the noise of speech was a bit much. It was completely understandable.

Evan shook his head, his eyes going wide with sudden apprehension. [Don't leave me alone. Please.] He signed rapidly. 

[I won't. It's alright.] He paused, hesitating. [Do you want to talk about what happened?] He didn't expect a yes, but when Evan nodded, he sat back so that all his attention was focused.

[So there was this group of guys, okay, and they kept following me around. Obviously, I was uncomfortable, so I went to tell them to stop when one of them grabbed the strap of my binder and snapped it.] Jared clenched his fists at that, but didn't do anything in response, letting Evan finish. [I ignored that, but when I told them to stop following me, they said that...] He stopped signing abruptly, pausing to breathe before he got himself too worked up again. [They said that I'd never be a real boy. Usually, that wouldn't bother me, but I was already on edge, so it was just bad.] When he was finished, he laid his hands on his lap, watching Jared for his reaction.

Though he would have liked to go find the guys who hurt Evan and beat them to hell, that would have to wait. For now, he needed to stay. [Evan, you should never listen to them. You're a boy, and nothing's going to change that.] Evan nodded, fiddling with the hem of his shirt as Jared continued. [You'll always be Evan, my best friend. I understand things get hard sometimes, but you know I love you.] Evan smiled softly. [I love you too, Jared.]

At that, Evan yawned, and Jared took that as a sign to stop talking for now. [Get some rest, buddy. You need it.] He signed, and Evan nodded. Jared watched him as he laid down, and when Evan motioned for him to lay next to him, he didn't hesitate.

He'd always be by his side, after all.


End file.
